Stewart 5

My wife Melissa is demonstrating an amazing amount of maturity these days.  I am both in awe and frustrated!  Here’s why…

As many of you know, we are finishing up our sabbatical.  Entering our last months, we are making multiple decisions – big ones, small ones, and many that open up a multitude of other decisions. These decisions relate to where we will be, what we will be doing, when… little things like that   So, important stuff.

And the PROCESS of these discussions and decisions is as telling as the results.  We are giving some of the work we and God have been doing in our lives and marriage a pretty good exercise.  How is our intimacy, how is our trust, can we say what we think, can we hear things we don’t like from one another, can we apologize?

I have to admit, I am a little more anxious than Melissa to get these conversations and decisions happening.  And although I wish we knew everything yesterday, I am proud that she is committed to waiting until she is confident in some things before moving forward.  Frustrated a bit, but proud.  She is bringing her strengths of thoughtfulness and discernment to our shared process.  And as I was telling a friend on the phone the other day, in watching her process I am reminded of a very good maxim… Seek the Giver.

back-story: when I was growing up in church, one of the principles that always came up when talking about spiritual gifts (those ways God supernaturally empowers people to serve) was, “don’t seek the gifts, but the gift-giver.”  In other words, don’t get overly-fixated on these specific gifts God can give (essentially a self-centered approach). Instead, seek God, and let His Spirit give gifts as God deems appropriate (see 1 Corinthians 12).

This came to mind as I was saying how one of the ways Melissa is discerning God’s desire is by being involved in a local Bible study on Jesus.  She isn’t only sitting with God and asking, “should we move to X?” every day.   Instead, she is connecting well with God, for the sake of their relationship alone.  I’m pretty confident that as she does, God is and will speak to those specifics because God loves her and knows they are important questions.

Thank you beloved for this reminder.  So glad to be doing this with you!

Comments(2)

In the rush to get our sabbatical started, pack up our entire house, and move from South Africa to California for the year, I haven’t sat down to write in detail about this sabbatical thingy.  But, with a little room to breathe, I wanted to start giving our friends more information on what we are up to.  I am sure this will turn into a multiple-post series, especially as we process and can begin to share what God is doing in us through the process.

In wrapping up our time with NieuCommunities in Pretoria and before starting for something new in Cape Town, we have a unique and precious window of time to let God prepare us in significant ways.  For today, some basics on the PURPOSES of our sabbatical…

1. The first purpose of our sabbatical is rest from several years of cross-cultural living and ministry.  We need to decompress, have time as a couple, and opportunity to do things as a family that we haven’t made as much time for in the last several years as we would have liked to.  We believe this will put us in a better place personally, spiritually, and relationally.

2. A second purpose of our sabbatical is restoration.  This is part of the reason we needed to leave our normal environment so we have time, space, and freedom from our normal obligations that can detract from making growth a top priority.  We are in the middle of a great program at Link Care in Fresno specifically designed for missionaries and their unique needs.  We will continue counseling throughout our time in Fresno as part of the process of continuing to grow into the people God wants us to be.  A big part of what we anticipate is deeper intimacy with God, one another, and all those God brings into our life.

3. A third reason for our sabbatical is reflection on the past several years of life and ministry.  What has taken place in our personal lives, what have we learned about life in community, how has God shaped and used us in South Africa, and what does all this mean for the future?  Expect lots of writing…

4. The final purpose for our sabbatical is preparation for what God has in store for us in this next season of life and ministry.  We have some pretty good ideas about what that will look like, but want God to confirm and clarify.  We expect God to further reveal hopes, details, and specifics.  We also anticipate this leading us to further training and learning to get us ready.  And, we want to use this time to develop the patterns and habits we will need to continue successfully in the next season.  Of course, you will hear more and more as we do, and as we gear up for all that is to come when our sabbatical ends on May 31.

For now, we are settling into life, school for the kids, and soon a new house (renting from friends) in Fresno!  More on all that, and some pics, soon

In the meantime, would appreciate your comments and prayers.

Comments(4)

Tonight is our last night in Pretoria.  Tomorrow, we pack away last things, take care of final details here, and head to the airport.  It’s hard to believe that we are moving and ending our time with the team we have worked with for over 6 years.  Yes, we know this season is done and God has new and exciting things ahead.  Yet we are feeling somewhere between sad and surreal in leaving.

Thanks to all who have made these last years so special.  And here’s to all those we jounrey with in days ahead!

Comments(3)

Pretoria is not the coldest place in South Africa.  But tonight, it will get down to about 2 degrees c (35 F).  In winter, you may experience the same temperature where you live.  But imagine…

Having no heater when it is that cold

Having no insulation when it is that cold

Living in a tin shack with a dirt floor when it is that cold

Having no electricity when it is that cold

Having no car when it is that cold

This is the reality for many South Africans tonight.  There is no escaping the cold when you live like many do here, as I’ve described above.  Our family is fortunate – we have a house with walls, some carpet, a small space heater, a car.  We will be cold tonight, but won’t suffer.

I know that most of you will read this in places where it is summe now, and you are in the opposite situation and can hardly imagine what this is like.  But remember.  Remember for those who can’t choose to be warm.  Join us in saying a prayer tonight for those who are cold.

Comments(0)

man, that title could have about 10 different meanings

When you write the date, how do you write it?

Seems like most (all?) Americans write month/day/year. Good job USA in getting us all to do it the same way.

My experience was always that other (European?) countries wrote day/month/year.  Makes sense as it is from smallest/most immediate to biggest unit. So, that’s how I learned to write the date in French class in high school and I’ve been writing the date since we moved to SA.

Here, I have found that people write the date all sorts of ways.  Seems like on hospital forms, they generally use year/month/day.  I’ve filled out bank forms one way, misc. official paperwork another way, and never know HOW an individual may write the date on something they give me.  I asked my son how they do it at school (where you’d think they’d be teaching the standard) and he told me that the do it one way (I’ve actually forgot which now) in all of his classes except math.  In math class, they write the date a different way.  What?  Maybe this has something to do with the changeover since Apartheid or some reality of Bantu education?  I don’t know, but I find it strange that everyone in the country doesn’t use the same way of writing the date.

Beyond making some clever societal observation, I am really interested in why this is done the way it is in different places.  There must be some meaning behind this…

Comments(3)

I spend LOTS of hours in two rooms today, both at the SA Department of Home Affairs in Pretoria.

The first is the room where you either turn in visa renewal forms or collect them when they are done.  There are two lines and three windows.  25% of the people who walk into the room try to walk straight up to one of the windows – passing everyone waiting in the queue.  I would say 60% stand in line for over an hour, only to reach the front and be told they needed to be in the OTHER line, which they will now stand in for an hour.  A full 75%+ begin or end up angry – at the people working there, at the process, at the confusing directions or lack thereof.  This is the angry room.  I would hate to work there, having to deal with angry people all day long.  Whose fault is it – the impatient customers, the indifferent or rude people at the counter, the department that can’t seem to give clear instructions or signage?  Yes!  I’ve done a little work with EQ and know that pissed off people basically emit their anger and it tends to spread to others around them.  I’m certain this takes place here.

The second room is the collection room.  After standing in line in the visa room, you might be fortunate enough to be told that your paperwork is ready for collection.  If this is the case, they don’t give it to you there at the window.  No, you are directed to go up two floor to the “collection room.”  After climbing the stairs, you have to sign in (not sure why, since it does not seem to be first-come-first-serve).  Then, after a while, a person comes and collects any paperwork, passports, etc. that need to be dealt with.  These are then taken to the back where officers process, stamp, fill out, etc.  Meanwhile, you wait, generally for hours.  My “favourite” part is that the people working there actually take lunch breaks and you have to stay there, on the outside chance that they call you.  This is the sleepy room.  Because you have nothing to do.  No tv.  You are already frustrated from standing in the first room, then being directed to the second.  At least you get to sit in this room.  Foolishly, you didn’t bring anything to do.  And, while there are actually windows here, often open, you can’t help but find yourself becoming hopelessly tired but unable to sleep.  By the time they call your name, you almost don’t notice or are somewhat confused because you’ve either forgotten why you’ve came or given up hope of ever being helped.

Today, I stood in the angry room for about 2 hours, then sat in the sleepy room for 5.  This makes for a long and tiring day – the power of two rooms.

Comments(2)

Was part of a great book discussion today on David Bosh’s crazy-good, often referred to, yet under appreciated Transforming Mission.  Bosch’s book is one of those that for some reason I have never got around to reading – until now.  So glad I am.  Beyond the reading, the discussions look like they will be both fun and challenging.  It’s nice to talk with a bunch of people who have hearts that resonate, and “get” one another.  So, we can dive deeper than just discussing theological/philosophical concepts to why and how it matters for our lives.  I think that just maybe we will find some ways to put parts into practice together as well.   Tom, Cobus, and Chris have written about this conversation/their thoughts.  I am sure that   Sure Joe will as well (especially since I just called him out).

So much that I would like to comment on, but I’ll save for other posts.  For now, maybe just a quote from the end of the chapter we were discussing.  I didn’t get a chance to say anything in our group, so here’s my chance…

In discussing the ways in which the early church participated in living signs of the Kingdom, Bosch maintains that they did so in a manner consistent with Jesus.  However, they failed in at least 3 ways.  First, the early church too quickly established what separated themselves from others rather than their calling and responsibility toward these others.  Second, the movement turned into an institution.  Third, the growing church marginalized the Jews (those from whom they were birthed).  Those of you who have studied organizations know that these are pretty common in the life cycle of any movement.  We always wonder how to influence the process so that institutionalization/fossilization doesn’t take place in some inevitable fashion.  I would dare say that this has happened with the emerging church in the USA (but Tony, I think you have wisely and subversively multiplied influence by deconstruction, perhaps preempting the process? – yet another blog post I should write).

Then Bosch throws in this little nugget that has left me thinking a lot: “Very few people can be both at the periphery and at the center at the same time.  And even if they do manage that, they usually do so only for a very short while” (52).  Crap!  We’re trying so hard to be a church for all people.  A place where homeless and affluent rub shoulders, where radical discipleship is the norm, not the exception.  Are you saying we can’t live on the edge and in the middle of society?

Bosch is right, I think.  All my years (oh so many years, at that) seem to point that way.  You choose to live on the edge or at the center.  Lots of young, excited, or naive people get started on the fringes.  What usually happens over time?  They get sucked toward the middle.  They become jaded, disenchanted, tired of fighting the system, or just plain selfish.  The middle has a strong pull, doesn’t it?  But I repeat: YOU CAN CHOOSE TO LIVE ON THE EDGE OR AT THE CENTER.

The edge is scary, risky, exciting, unknown, and the place of miracles because God is needed.  It’’s real reality, the “thin place” where heaven and earth come close together.  It’s the place of angels and demons.  It’s where we see God’s Kingdom coming.  It’s where I want to be.  If I must choose between the periphery and center, I choose the edge.

I choose the edge.

Comments(2)

I read this morning and was so encouraged that I wanted to pass it on.

This article says that many white South Africans are coming back to South Africa.  Two specific parts I find interesting:

Moving companies, real estate agents and non-profit groups say more and more white South Africans in their late 20s and beyond are returning to South Africa. Hungry for their own culture, eager to raise children near their own families, and encouraged by their country’s economic potential, these adults are leaving their successful careers abroad for an uncertain future at home.

So, these are people whose families moved from SA, probably at the end of Apartheid, who are becoming adults and choosing to return home.  I would suspect that many are intentionally rejecting some of the values of their parents that caused them to leave years ago.

“We’ve certainly seen South Africans returning,” said Homecoming Revolution manager Martine Schaffer, whose website draws 17 000 new visitors each month. “At the beginning of this year, I think we have more people returning than leaving.”

More people returning than leaving…  Could it be that people are now deciding to stick it out and make South Africa a better place instead of running away from problems (perceived or real)?  I’ve always thought that South Africa will be a lot more interesting in the 10-20 years after Apartheid.  The first 10 years were certainly full of significant change, but now reality sets in.  Hopes in the government and all its promises are fading a bit.

Now what?  My hope is that this is when God’s people can show true, lasting, and life-transforming hope.  So glad to be here now!

Here is a company encouraging South Africans to come home.

Comments(3)

A bunch of us attended the Institute for Urban Ministry’s Bi-Annual Consultation this past Wednesday- Friday.  Lots of great people, speakers, and conversations.  Perhaps what sticks out most to me was the devotion that my friend Wilna de Beer gave on Friday morning.  She talked about courage, referring to the story of Jael in Judges 4:17-23.

I won’t recount the story here (but do look it up).  I will, however, repeat (paraphrase) Wilna’s points on courage (my comments in italics):

1. It is the ordinary things that prepare us for the extraordinary events.  How many of us seek training, being with the “right” people, etc. to prepare?  Or, how many of us just want to do the “big things” without the difficult or MUNDANE preparation that comes day in/day out over years?  I think of how Melissa, by loving and raising our kids, is developing and using skills that are nothing less than extraordinary.
2. Deliverance often comes from unexpected sources.  Hear that one pastors?  Hear that one men?  Hear that superstars?  History is not made by great people.  They just seem great in retrospect  (I just made that up).  Props to everyone who is overlooked.  You have a better chance of being used by God to change the world than I.
3. We need action, not just words.  Stop making plans and do something.  Think as you go.
4. Be willing.  In the end, this is all God asks and needs.  Are you wiling?  Are you?

I believe most leaders are leaders simply because they do something.  What is God putting on your heart?  Please do it.  Do not be afraid.  God is with you. God will never leave you nor forsake you.

May it be so.

Comments(1)

Is it possible to get unbiased news?  Or, should we just call a spade a spade – all news is filtered, selected, and given from some perspective.  If we acknowledge this, we must be more critical of what we are presented with.

Here is an excellent article about how “news” is often presented in South Africa, especially as it betrays certain commonly-held misconceptions and slants.

For those of you who are unaware, it’s pretty popular in SA, especially in the media, to paint a negative picture of the country.  Not sure exactly why that is, but here are a couple of my guesses:

1. South Africa has an inferiority complex.  Unlike America, who generally thinks she is best and every and all things, SA most often minimizes its achievements and points out its many faults.
2. Because of its long isolation from the rest of the globe, there is a major, “grass is greener on the other side” feel.  And, if all you know about the rest of the world comes from TV, of course it all looks better.
3. Ambivalence in the media toward the average South African.  Seems that journalists here are generally more educated, well off, and liberal than the average populace.  So, there is a tendency to look down on, and even denigrate, life as most people live it.

Would love your thoughts on media bias & the negative tone of SA journalism.

Comments(3)